Brass Monkeys

 Damn it's cold.
predicted low for tonight is -39 C (-38 F - like you needed it
translated)

Justb thought I would share.

Hot toddies all around Shirley.
--
Bob Mann
Some people just don't know how to drive...
I call these people "Everybody But Me,"

 Bob Mann wrote:

Yes indeed. Too cold by far for me.

Bet you a dollar you don't know the common origin of the term "Cold
enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey".

Now Google now, either you know it or you don't.

 On Mon, 05 Feb 2007 02:37:14 -0500, Nasty


Brass Monkey was a rack to hold Cannon balls the tale goes that when
it gets so cold the cannon balls contract they roll off. Pretty sure I
saw something on this a while back that it was impossible.


Ironhorse, AH#130, HSB#96, SENS BS#187
2001 Ultraclassic with Sidecar
96 Custom bucket of bolts (gone but not forgotten)

Republicans think every day is 4th of July
Democrats think every day is April 15th
Ronald Reagan

 Ironhorse wrote:

Close enough! Give the man a cold one.

I think the tale was that the brass rack would contract faster than the
cannon balls but it prolly isn't true anyway.

 Nasty wrote:

That explanation remind me of this Monty Python bit:


THE PRINCE OF WALES:
     Ah, my congratulations, Wilde. Your play is a great success. The whole of
London's talking
about you.
OSCAR WILDE:
     Your highness, there is only one thing in the world worse than being talked
about, and that is
not being talked about.

     (There follows fifteen seconds of restrained and sycophantic laughter)
THE PRINCE OF WALES:
     Oh, very witty, Wilde ..... very, very witty.
JAMES McNEILL WHISTLER:
     There is only one thing in the world worse than being witty, and that is
not being witty.

     (Fifteeen more seconds of the same)
OSCAR WILDE:
     I wish I had said that Whistler.
JAMES McNEILL WHISTLER:
     Ah, you will, Oscar, you will.

     (more laughter)
OSCAR WILDE:
     Your Highness, do you know James McNeill Whistler?
THE PRINCE OF WALES:
     Yes, we've played squash together.
OSCAR WILDE:
     There is only one thing worse than playing squash together, and that is
playing it by yourself.

     (silence)
OSCAR WILDE:
     I wish I hadn't said that.
JAMES McNEILL WHISTLER:
     But you did, Oscar, you did.

     (a little laughter)
THE PRINCE OF WALES:
     Well, you must forgive me, Wilde, but I must get back up the Palace.
OSCAR WILDE:
     Your Majesty, you're like a big jam doughnut with cream on the top.
THE PRINCE OF WALES:
     I beg your pardon?
OSCAR WILDE:
     Um ..... It was one of Whistler's.
JAMES McNEILL WHISTLER:
     I didn't say that.
OSCAR WILDE:
     You did, James, you did.
THE PRINCE OF WALES:
     Well, Mr. Whistler?
JAMES McNEILL WHISTLER:
     I- I meant, Your Majesty, that, uh, like a doughnut your arrival gives us
pleasure and your
departure merely makes us hungry for more.

     (laughter and congratulations)
JAMES McNEILL WHISTLER:
     Yes, thank you. Right, Your Majesty is like a stream of bat's piss.

     (gasps)
THE PRINCE OF WALES:
     What?
JAMES McNEILL WHISTLER:
     It was one of Wilde's.
OSCAR WILDE:
     It sodding was not! It was Shaw!
THE PRINCE OF WALES:
     Well, Mr. Shaw?
GEORGE BERNARD SHAW:
     I, um, I, ah, I merely meant, Your Majesty, that, ah, you shine out like a
shaft of gold when
all around is dark.
THE PRINCE OF WALES:
     Oh, ho-ho, very good.
GEORGE BERNARD SHAW:
     Right. Your Majesty is like a dose of clap.

     (gasps)
THE PRINCE OF WALES:
     What?!?
GEORGE BERNARD SHAW:
     Before you arrive is pleasure, but after is a pain in the dong.
THE PRINCE OF WALES:
     I beg your pardon?
GEORGE BERNARD SHAW:
     It was one of Wilde's.
OSCAR WILDE:
     Wha-
THE PRINCE OF WALES:
     Well, Mr. Wilde?
GEORGE BERNARD SHAW:
     Come on, Ozzy.
OSCAR WILDE:
     Uh ..... uh, wha-, wha- .....
GEORGE BERNARD SHAW:
     Come on, Ozzy, now, tell us all about it.
OSCAR WILDE:
     Wha-, what I meant, Your Majesty, uh-h-h .....

     (general heckling from the crowd)
JAMES McNEILL WHISTLER:
     Let's have a bit of the old wit then!
OSCAR WILDE:
     What, what-
THE PRINCE OF WALES:
     I'm waiting.
OSCAR WILDE:
     What I-, what I meant was .....
GEORGE BERNARD SHAW:
     Come on, Ozzy, .....
JAMES McNEILL WHISTLER:
     Give us a bit of the wit, Oz.
OSCAR WILDE:
     Um, w-w-what I meant, Your Majesty, w-was ..... oh ..... (blows a raspberry)

     (The Prince shakes Wilde's hand. Laughter all round.)
THE PRINCE OF WALES:
     Oh! Excellent! Excellent, Wilde! Very witty, Wilde.
JAMES McNEILL WHISTLER:
     Nice one, Oz!
THE PRINCE OF WALES:
     Can you come and do that up the Palace some time? Extremely funny, ha-ha-ha
.....